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Imagine this man has been missing for almost your entire existence and once your family decides you are worth the investment of a brighter future, the laws of the land prevent your freedom until you are eighteen and well even at that point comes even more garbage.
No one knew what he put you through without even being in your presence, how you have readjusted your emotions to not feel the unwanted anger.
Your world turns to utter rubbish when your mother falls ill and leaves the dreadful place called Earth, you are not alone but it surely felt that way. Learning everything on your own, wanting to go away from everything and wishing you were never born.
There is no explanation for what it feels like to be told that your fathers mother told him you are not his child before you were even born and he did nothing but accept it, a fellow woman that should be there for you has managed to deny you as if she was there, in the presence of your parents during the act of your creation.
The depression was always present on your mothers face but she never spoke it and never wished you ill, yet you were well aware of her agony.
Finally he finds a way to meet you and you see his instant regret etched on his face, you can tell he knew he was wrong for being a boy instead of a responsible man, ask him to leave your growing world that was almost peaceful then you lose concentration and of course focus leaves so university became impossible to complete.
Do not ask me what i regret the most because it is my very existence. No one to understand that you do not want to be the victim. How do you uplift yourself when you are dragged down constantly is a big question you desperately need answered.
